Christmas is here and the puppies I'm giving away are all wrapped up, so all that remains for me to do is write a festive post for my blog. Will this do?:
A DIY store has been playing foul-mouthed Christmas songs to their customers.
Staff at B&Q in Stockport, Greater Manchester, mistakenly put on a South Park CD entitled Mr Hankey The Christmas Poo, reports The Sun.
Dad Grant Sullivan, who was shopping with his four-year-old daughter Deonne, said: "The song was playing in the Christmas grotto - I couldn't believe my ears.
"We were buying a tree and Deonne was looking for the star for the top of it. I was speechless."
One of the songs contains the lyrics: "Mr Hankey the Christmas Poo, small and brown he comes from you."