Monday, January 03, 2011

How Government Works

To mark the passing of actor Pete Postlethwaite, John Prescott pens a moving tribute to the courage, decency and effectiveness of..... John Prescott. He writes how Postlethwaite influenced him:

His character, band leader Danny, after spending his life wanting to win the national brass band trophy, symbolically turns it down because he knows it's the only way he can get publicity for the 1,000 miners who were sacked from his pit.

The line that got me was: "This government has systematically destroyed an entire industry – our industry. And not just our industry – our communities, our homes, our lives. All in the name of 'progress'. And for a few lousy bob."

You can watch it here. I defy you not to cry.

These communities had their heart ripped out by successive Tory governments. 200,000 were thrown on to the dole and were just left to rot. That led to increasing rates of worklessness and despair.

It made me so angry and I thought we must do something. I then realised I was the minister in charge!
So presumably if  Prezza had watched Toy Story he would have directed his ministry to create a programme to tackle the problem of old toys being discarded when children get newer, shinier ones.


Mr Eugenides said...

And so Mr Prescott reopened all the pits and the coalminers went back to work, and they all lived happily ever after.

The End.

Oh no, wait;

And so Mr Prescott went and fucked his secretary in his office, and then sat on the toilet for seven hours shitting out a turd the size of the Albert Hall.

And they all lived happily ever after.

Ross said...

Yes, except they started mining material for windmills so that John Prescott could defeat climate change.

JuliaM said...

Perhaps it was watching 'A Night To Remember' that suggested a life on the open waves..?

Ross said...

Julia- Perhaps we should have a competition, everyone suggests which film Prescott was watching before each notable act.

For instance did punching the Mulleted egg thrower come after watching "Fight Club", did "Driving Miss Daisy" cause him to get chauffuer driven Jaguars?

JuliaM said...

I think, for most of it, he was watching 'Debbie Does Dallas'...

Paddy said...

I was going to play your game, Ross, but then I realised that beyond screwing his secretary, thumping a voter and the two Jaguars, I couldn't think of a single other achievement of Lord Prescott in 10 years as DPM.

Oh hang on, he played croquet. Was that based on that working-class movie Alice in Wonderland? And there was the M4 bus lane, which was clearly inspired by him watching Speed and wondering how on earth we could handle a runaway bus with a bomb on board unless one lane of the motorway out of Heathrow was taken out of action

Paddy said...

By the way, good to see your name again Eugenides. Please start blogging again! You are missed.