Monday, February 23, 2009

Start Smoking & Contract Herpes.

Unlike many bloggers I have a social conscience and like to provide health advice to my readers. Two of the medical conditions that I am keen to avoid like the plague are the er bubonic plague and Parkinson's. So how do you avoid these debilitating conditions?
  • Parkinsons- The key to avoiding this tragic degenerative illness is to take up smoking. I'm not sure how much you need to smoke in order to prevent the condition arising but I'd start with 40 a day to be on the safe side. As a bonus it will also make you less susceptible to Alzheimer's (or possibly more susceptible).
  • Plague- the best way of avoiding plague is to contract the protective Herpes virus.or nature's penicillin as I like to think of it. All that Herpy goodness appears to prevent plague in mice.


Sue said...

That's cheered an otherwise dismal day up. I smoke and have had chicken pox!

Dave H said...

Trust me on this: I strongly advise you to avoid Fournier's Gangrene.

Ross said...

I've just looked up Fournier's Gangrene and I have to concur.

It must have been a let down for the Fournier family when their doctor son came home from work and announced that the family name would be immortalised by having a medical condition named after him.