Though my eyes may have glazed lazily over by about the time the anthems finished I listened with glee as the simile-laden commentator vomited glorious awful on cue, pulling out every Caribean racial stereotype he could muster, even imagining happily that the half time teamtalk would probably consist of the coach telling them all just to "chill". At one point I am convinced Gareth Southgate manfully wrestled him from the microphone just as he was about to launch into "Dem Bois be playin wid sum silkly skills mon" in a deep Rastafarian baritone.
Matthew Turner notes specific examples on his blog including:
The ITV commentator (is it Clive Tyldesley?) has just suggested the T&T half-time team advice from their Dutch manager will be "Hey, just chill". He also added that there would be 'strange scents' from the T&T fan's parties later one. And that - this was Southgate's - they shouldn't be booked for time-wasting as that was the 'natural speed they move at off the pitch'.
Isn't the England versus Trinidad game on ITV? This is car crash tv in prospect. I reckon he's going to black up for the occassion.