Cows are supposedly dangerous, with 3 people being killed in the UK this year alone as well as numerous deaths overseas. David Blunkett was also reported to have been attacked by a cow although seeing as he's blind how can he be sure it wasn't a disgruntled voter making a moo sound as they kicked him?
The safest method of approaching a cow is to put it between two slices of bread and garnish it with lettuce, ketchup and gherkins, however if you insist on live bovine encounters the this is how to deal with the danger:
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9 comments:
Didn't you once claim to be that disgruntled voter?
Oh, I've had a number of "live bovine encounters" during recent years; but that's because it is the in-house (mostly by badly-treated council staff, I am told) nickname for one of the Labour councillors here…
That's a yak!
Mark- Yes but I'm keeping quiet about that until the heat dies down.
John- That's terribly insulting to cows, comparing them to Labour councillors.
Julia- It's large and made of beef that's all I know.
I once lay with a cow in a field. I do not wish to supply the details.
Cow's milk is for babies and little cows.
Cows on the other hand are an abomination of science. Incapable of replicating naturally. With a gene pool so shallow that even a baby chav could not claim to have drowned init. They moo, a lot.
I suggest all cows must die.
"Cows on the other hand are an abomination of science. Incapable of replicating naturally. "
Eh?
Some of the larger beef breeds are indeed too large and muscular to 'do the deed', so AI is needed...
I hope the bull took out his gene pool.
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